Heart Connection involves elements of all the main practices I have immersed myself in over the last 20 years: meditation, yoga, mindful movement, ecstatic dance and tantra. Themes of sessions include connecting with self and other, opening the heart, delighting in the senses, expressing boundaries, movement and stillness, safe touch, honest communication, and simply being in the presence of another and being aware of what thoughts and feelings arise.

These themes are explored through fun, simple exercises done either individually, in pairs, or with the whole group - in a safe space in which boundaries are always respected. The intention is primarily two-fold: firstly, to step into a deeper, more self-accepting and self-honouring awareness; and secondly, to open to a more real, playful, and potentially magical connection with others.

The most commonly expressed fear around any work which contains elements of tantra is that “I might have to do something I don’t want to do, with someone I don’t like the look of”. This is an important issue and there are several things I’d like to say about it:

(a) Heart Connection is not about ignoring your boundaries, or letting anyone else trample on them. In fact, quite the opposite. It involves paying greater attention to your own boundaries, practising communicating them clearly and without blame, and bringing awareness to the extent to which your current boundaries are currently serving you. (for example: “Am I keeping too much out? Am I letting too much in? How about now?”). You will be encouraged to be in touch with what is alive in you right now and to communicate it clearly – with the knowledge that both a “yes” and a “no” are equally valid responses.

(b) No one ever has to do anything they don’t want to do – Heart Connection is not like school. All the exercises are invitations, often to step a little beyond your habitual ways of being, and perhaps to step slightly outside your comfort zone. This, after all, is where so much magic and learning can happen. But they remain invitations, and you are always free to step out of an exercise if you prefer. Most exercises can also be modified or adapted to meet any particular needs for safety or reassurance.

(c) One way of viewing others is to see in them mirrors of our own experience. For example, if we sense sadness in another, that can only happen if we know something of sadness within ourselves. The same is true of joy, anger, ecstasy, resentment, love, and so on. As you look around at the other faces in the group, and notice any judgements arising about them, one choice you can make is simply to see each of them as mirroring different aspects of yourself. Some of these aspects are likely to be welcome to you, others less so. Viewed in this way, it is possible to learn more about yourself simply through connecting with others. Note again that “connecting with others ” does not mean being completely open to them. It means staying present and aware of your boundaries, and what you are comfortable with in every moment.

(d) Some people may have heard that tantra and related practices involve mass orgies with complete strangers. If that’s what you’re looking for, good luck! But that’s not what Heart Connection (or most schools of tantra) are about. The misunderstanding has arisen because tantra as a practise fully welcomes and celebrates every aspect of your being – it doesn’t divide you up into “sacred aspects” and “non-sacred aspects”. Therefore your sexuality and sexual energy is as fully welcome, as fully available for healing and transformation, as any other aspect of you. To me this makes a huge amount of sense, as it is quite common for there to be unconsciousness, taboos and wounds around our sexual energy, both culturally and individually. Through tantric practice it is also possible to become of aware of how your sexual energy is really no different from your life-force, the living, streaming energy inside you. In Heart Connection, or any reputable tantra school, issues of sexuality will always be approached sensitively and very much within the context of a loving, safe, and sacred space. The majority of other spiritual practises do not work directly with sexual energy, with some even going so far as to assert that spirituality and sexuality are somehow incompatible. This is not my experience, and I feel that tantra is right to recognise the whole being as worthy of acceptance, honouring and celebration. If you continue down any path of tantra, sooner or later you will come across exercises which are specifically designed to awaken, heal and honour your sexuality. But Heart Connection, and many tantric schools, will not take sexuality as the starting point. If you have any concerns about the level of sexual content within any course, I would recommend speaking with the teacher beforehand.

For me, the exercises and elements of Heart Connection have brought a greater ease and delight in my creativity and relationships, particularly my intimate ones, a greatly increased self-acceptance, and a deeper sense of joy at the potential magic of being here. But I think it’s also about more than just feeling good. If our future together is to be a sustainable, just and joyful one, it feels important to live from a sense of our connectedness to our fellow human beings and the world in which we live.
For me, the key questions which need to be asked are: “Do I feel fully free and alive in myself; am I able to speak and act from my heart; do I live from a sense of the sacredness of this world and all life in it; can I embrace and celebrate all aspects of my being – including the innocence and joy of my sexual energy; can I love, wholeheartedly and unreservedly?”

If your answer to any of these questions is not a resounding “YES!”, then Heart Connection may have something to offer you.